Pregnancy Week 19
We are almost halfway through the 2nd trimester, and halfway through our pregnancy! It’s Week 19 now, and how thankful I am that the nausea is subsiding and my energy is slowly returning. There are a few contenders for names for our baby boy, but no clear winner yet.
I’m thankful for all the people who prayed for us, put our names in the temple, and eased my mind about the baby and our concerning ultrasound findings. The blood test results I did for genetic screening were good news- Low Risk for certain specific genetic variants (Trisomy 21, 18, 13, Monosomy X, etc). Our baby is very unlikely to have them. I feel so relieved and blessed and grateful!
What has changed with my body? I have a little baby bump now! It’s difficult for me to sleep at night, I’m not sure why but my mind churns, I have a hard time finding a comfortable position, and I’m constantly getting up to the restroom. I try to eat a little at a time and can’t handle larger meals or too much food without having major acid reflux. I can have meat and all kinds of foods now! Still don’t do onions or seafood, though. Still have major cravings for sweets and carby junk food that I fight with myself about because I am trying to avoid gestational diabetes.
Jer has been the most loving partner. Our water heater broke the other day, and he boiled several pots of water lugging it up and down the stairs in many batches because he wanted me to be able to have a warm bath. He acquired a grill to cook meats and food outside without upsetting my very sensitive nose and trigger nausea for me inside the house. He has been making meals nonstop without complaint, inviting me to go on walks with him so that I can get some exercise, giving me back rubs when I have aches in my lower back, and rubbing lotion on my feet because I can no longer reach. Every day he looks me in the eyes and tells me how beautiful I am, and it just makes me glow inside with how cherished he makes me feel. I do feel beautiful with a growing baby bump!
I’m so glad that Jer was able to have his field study in Boston because I was forced not to rely on him so much. It’s like back in the day when he was on the other side of the country. I’m making smoothies again and using the instant pot, slowing down to bake with the kids, taking them on outings to the library and on my grocery runs, and letting them happily play outside for hours with friends. I’ve even been preparing the house by decluttering and trying to get more organized so we have room. It felt like we had climbed my personal Everest when L and I cleaned all the bathrooms, and I was so grateful to have that part of the house feel restored!
I was released from my calling in the Relief Society presidency at church so that I could focus on caring for the baby and my family. This was such an act of love from my RS President to do for me; I was willing to carry all of my responsibilities as long as I was able, I know she is as resistant to change as I am, and she freed me from having to choose. I feel my Savior’s love for me in this change, like He is trying to help us stay pregnant as long as possible and give me the time and energy I need to have better success in that. We have been praying as a family for the baby’s health and growth, and maybe even for a Miracle that baby will be able to make it to full term, and it feels like God is answering. Not having a calling will help me to have room to breathe and rest, help me to worry / stress less, and simplify my life. I just miss being closely connected with my sisters in the ward, and feeling the spirit consistently as I served. I’ll be looking for more personal ways to keep that up.
This pregnancy is helping me to have courage to let go, to choose my baby and my health over everything else. Even with emotionally / mentally draining family drama with not being able to attend my sister’s out-of-state wedding and needing to cancel non-refundable flights, the hurt from my sister eloping anyway, and just processing all the feelings that come with it. . . Just have to accept the loss, let it go, and do what I need to for peace. Lately that has been in the temple, and go as often as I can before baby comes. I ask for help a lot more from the kids, especially while Jer is gone, for things like caring for the dog and filling my water bottle and even warming up taquitos. The kids are always the sweetest, doing what I ask right away and without complaint, and they fill my Mama heart with their cuddles and declarations of love for the baby as they hug my tummy. I have to be up front with them when I am tired and need a nap. I do still get burned out, and today was the first time I stayed in bed until noon but they just rolled with it and played until I came out.
I feel like I can do this.
Love, Kat
